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Canceling Christmas is the first episode of Albert the Cat, released on December 24th, 2020.

Plot[]

Albert loses a bucket of wings from Roasters. Robert and Caryn tell him that it doesn't matter, because Roasters is the same as KFC, since it was bought out by KFC in 1971. However, Albert keeps insisting that KFC wings taste differently.

In search of wings, Albert leaves his underground bunker and ends up upstairs, where his 'owner', Ralph, has already invited all his 'friends' to celebrate Christmas and is waiting for them. While searching the house, Albert catches a glimpse of Santa Claus on TV talking about "Santafest", before Ralph comes over and switches the channel to a nature documentary about dolphins, which infuriates Albert.

Albert goes back to his bunker and reveals to Caryn and Robert that he is planning to enslave Santa Claus so that he grants Albert's wish and brings Roasters back. Robert and Caryn try to educate him on what Christmas is and that Santa isn't real, but wanting to hear none of it Albert switches Caryn off and enlists Robert to venture out to Santa's homeland - Lapland. Before they can leave, Albert's bomb he packed into a sack explodes, causing a blackout. Robert and Albert bicker as Albert struggles to locate and then put batteries into a flashlight.

Robert and Albert arrive in Lapland, where they witness a battle between a Santa-bot and a bunch of elves. The elves take them prisoner for interrogation, where Albert and Robert learn that Krampus has killed Santa Claus a long time ago and started a war between the elves. Soon after, it is revealed that there were traitors among the elf resistance squad. They take everyone, including Albert and Robert, to Krampus, who reveals in his evil speech that he was the one organising "Santafest" as part of a plan to take over the world, using Santa's ashes he entrapped in a flask. Albert knocks Krampus out to have the ashes to himself and fulfill his wish. Krampus wakes up and charges Albert into his space ship, which kills every last elf, except elf Lenin.

Krampus, Albert and Robert fly over the city, fulfilling a couple of wishes along the way, including Ralph's wish to spend Christmas with his friends. Crashing into a building, Albert and Krampus continue to fight over the flask, before shattering it. The spirit of Santa Claus is freed as a result, he kills Krampus by inciniration, and to thank Albert for freeing him, he grants his wish - a bucket of Roasters chicken wings. Santa grants him the wish, but Albert ends up getting KFC instead of Roasters, because Santa thinks it's the same thing.

Feeling defeated, Albert returns home, where Robert finds the Roasters wings.

Characters[]

  • Albert
  • Robert
  • Caryn
  • Ralph
  • Elves
    • Bartholomew
    • Judas
    • Elf Lenin
    • Private
    • Judy
    • Elf Santoholm
  • Ben
  • Willy
  • Narrator
  • Santa Claus
  • Children
  • Krampus
  • Guy

References[]

[WIP]

Trivia[]

  • In the original version, Albert chases after Rostix (orig. РОСТИК'С) chicken wings, which was a restaurant that served fried chicken. It was later 'absorbed' by the "Yum! Brands" corporation, which KFC is part of, in order to secure the leading position in the fast food industry across the territory of Russian Federation and in other countries that are part of the Commonwealth of Independent States (CIS).
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